Saturday, June 25, 2016
I Am Not Brave
I. Am. Not. Brave.
There are lots of things that scare me. Speed, heights, snakes, rats, airplanes -- even little mice. This week I picked up a big ol'snake in my driveway with a shovel and put it in the empty trash can nearby, and people called me brave. But I am not brave. I was too scared to let it crawl around in my yard, and too scared to kill it because then there might be 2 pieces of snake crawling toward me.!! Beside, I didn't want to see snake guts either. So I shoveled it up and dropped it into the trash can to wait until my for real brave husband to come home and get rid of it. So no, I am not brave.
And now I am facing a very scary surgery next week, but with 3 days to go, I still have an incredible peace. I am not lying awake at night or hyperventilating -- it is the strangest thing! The only explanation is -- God. There are lots of people praying for me -- not just saying it, but really sincerely making a commitment to pray. And as I have been working through my journaling Bible, there are so many verses that seem to be written just for me.
One of my husband's favorite actors, John Wayne, said "Courage is being scared to death...but saddling up anyway." John Wayne, by the way, also had lung surgery. So, I am saddling up, facing what has to be done, but with a peace that passes understanding.